Art and Cannabis a Healing Trauma Therapy Journey.

Come in to learn Art and Cannabis a Healing Trauma Therapy Journey. Artist Muffy.D one of the feature artists in the upcoming intimate "Unfinished" Art Show in Phoenix, Arizona March 13, 2021. You will hear how Cannabis Art therapy opened expression of trauma healing pain as she draws her life.

We take a serious look at the impact of trauma on a person’s life. MuffyD is incredibly open and expressive in sharing her journey with self-healing in an immensely powerful and uplifting conversation. Taking us on a piece of her journey how cannabis and art combined opened her mind and heart to allow healing and growth.

What you will learn from this inner-healing talk:

- She walks you through a few art pieces and healing growth.

- A very open and honest healing journey shared.

- Did art make cannabis better or did cannabis make the art better?

- Learn how COVID opened time to heal and grow.

- plus much more

Learn more about the other featured artist listen to Episode 8: to meet CannaKitty.


Host Debi - To stay informed each time we uplift on cannabis and inner-healing and self-growth hit the follow a subscribe button. In today's podcast MuffyD is dropping in to talk about her upcoming trauma art show “Unfinished”. Find a comfortable place to allow yourself to relax and be uplifted as she shares with us how she combined cannabis and art for self-healing and growth.

Debi - Morning and thank you for being here.

Guest MuffyD - Thank you miss Debi, thank you for having me.

Debi -We're glad you're here. So, when did you first discover or learn about trauma art and become interested in exploring it for yourself?

MuffyD - I think because trauma art is such a big word and I was thinking on this and I think I’ve always always loved art, I always loved music. Growing up though it wasn't readily available, and it definitely wasn't encouraged. I wanted to draw and do things all the time and I was explained to by my mother that the things that we draw we make happen and so as I’ve grown up and I’ve learned what actual trauma and things are in children's behavior we really draw what we see and what is happening, and I think she really did not want me to express anything of that sort. So, I kind of had art just inside of me. I feel like I’ve been practicing but it was never outwards. Um definitely not onto a paper, a canvas. Um I did do a lot of arts and crafts and so I think I subconsciously was doing art through that but there was no real; they were gifts to my friends there was no real art for me um or any of my feelings. But I loved, loved, loved going to art museums music my friends were very very much artists and so I think just I was gravitated towards it it's just it was never readily available until recently when I got to cannabis community.

Debi - So how did you get introduced to Irene, CannaKitty LLC?

MuffyD - Um we were looking for artists to decorate the walls at the dispensary that I worked at and she was one of the artists that just was well known in the community well liked. I gravitated towards her art she actually kind of taught me it doesn't need to be so serious it doesn't need to be any kind of perfection it's the beauty that like the happy that we checked out in. So, I saw her cartoon ones which I could not stop looking at and so it was um “Road Runner and the Coyote” on one of them and I was just like thinking about how in children we gravitate towards you know certain shows and things like that. I just wanted her stuff all over the place I wanted to stare at it and see why she chose these subjects and how much happy it was bringing people. Just looking at them kind of bringing them back to a space in their life that was a happy memory that's how I got her in; to our store. But then we had our third anniversary I actually got to really talk to her a little bit and something about her I just wanted to know more, and it wasn't until the Etiquette Crew started that we actually really did start to talk about and become real good friends and

Debi - So did you see it as trauma art when you saw her pieces, or did you just see it as an expression?

MuffyD - I think at that point in my head I really did not think about my trauma I think I was very auto piloted. I'm a disassociated kind of person I found out. I check out in really like, like pretty colors, moments, I dance and sing in my head a lot and so until I actually did some trauma work through shadow work just recently I did not understand why I like the art that I liked. Why that was my first question in my trauma therapy why I like the things I like and why do I do the things I do. I did not see it as trauma art I saw it as a happy she brought happy to me like I said I just wanted to know more about her art. I don't think we ever spoke that it was trauma art until recently to about a year ago. So, paint to canvas was always a challenge for me nobody supported it until I had gotten Miss CannaKitty in my life it was protected, it was respected. Um it wasn't constantly like you're taking too much time on that, why are you doing that I've been doing it for 20 minutes. It's like my heart is pouring out onto something and you want me to put a time limit on it and so it was never really safe really to do any of it. I didn't want to share it with anybody around me they didn't deserve to know those parts of me and so I would just never do it.

Debi - So now that you're doing it how do you feel and how do you feel about people being able to see that?

MuffyD - Okay okay, I didn't know I could paint that's why I say I think I've been practicing inside myself my whole life. Um the things that are coming out it's they actually look like portraits of people. Um I know my very first piece was on a one of those screen doors and I had with this tiny little pencil sharpened it and I don't know how my dreams came out onto this huge um screen door and for some reason. Someone else wanted it and I took a knife to it and I shredded it up and I still have this piece it'll be one of the pieces at the art show um that I will be stitching up with red stitching. It's only got parts to it but I couldn't believe that it was I, I feel like I draw in the shadows. I don't know if that makes sense but there's no real image on the canvas until um, I’ve done some marks and then I step back and then I start to see images and faces and I start to darken them in. Until COVID hit I never did an actual thought-out sketched piece, and I did a self-portrait and it looked like a person so I was like I need to do more and like without the support it would be ; I couldn't have gotten to that place. I really don't know how to speak on it much except for I can actually look at it now and it feels like it's out of me and I can give it respect and validation and know that I overcame it I'm safe um I'm not ashamed.

Debi – Yeah

MuffyD – Anymore, I know I was like once that shame is gone nobody can get me especially myself that mean voice is is quieter it's still there at times; of course; self-doubt but I hear Miss Debi's voice you know I hear Miss Irene's voice. I hear these other voices now that tell me you know keep going you are okay, and I think we do need to hear those words um when we do come from trauma. No matter how much we tell ourselves it wasn't you it's not your fault um as some strange reason as humans we need some kind of connection understanding from another being. I’m feeling I’m still learning a lot about it so.

Debi – Well and that's that's good though but how do you feel, do you feel comfortable with people seeing now what you put on canvas?

MuffyD – Yes

Debi - You won't uh shred it up this time.

MuffyD – I used to destroy everything I made I think that's weird that you said that. Anything I’ve made prior it was always destroyed in some way. Someone; I don't know like I said I didn't want to share those parts of me and it's like it's almost a permanent thing once you put it on something. Today I know how much art helped me um I don't want to say I was dead inside, but I definitely didn't feel much except for when I went to art crap. You know what I mean little cute things that meant something so important um they made me feel so it still made me feel alive and that's what art did to me um for me.

Debi - Well it's a it's a touch with a feeling.

MuffyD - It is a feeling. Growing up I really didn't have much music I had my dad's records and I had maybe two tapes. Like I said once I saw it it's like I really poured myself if I had an opportunity with art and so to be able to make it myself and I hope people can look at it and feel something and know no matter what we went through and I know some of it's gonna be really harsh but just know like I am okay and I. Yeah and if I can help someone else just have some moments of peace knowing that they're not alone even if I don't get to talk to them I mean I think that is my biggest thing I just want a longer reach now that I’ve found that this this is helpful um to tell our story. Yeah, I want to be more helpful.

Debi - Well I think as women we've been taught to not talk about this stuff and that is not the way we deal with trauma. That's not the way we should deal with things that happen in our life is that we should be able to be open.

MuffyD - And I think it's the generational thing right now It keeps coming up that we are at a time right now to change generational cycles um there was no other time we could do it. So, to and when we think about the women history it is look at hysteria, look at housewives that just spoke a little bit. What were they locked away put-on crazy types of medication to make them more crazy and I think it's because we are so powerful to be able to take on emotions, create life, still be soft and then still step up and take care of life and I think that's why we are constantly being bombarded in a man's world to be locked up to be shamed away. The criteria of a woman this is unattainable it's ridiculous I am not gonna hit any of those marks. Um some of um but like the more I understand who we're supposed to be there's no criteria for anybody to each its own on all of it and until we can accept. I, it took me a while to accept that for myself and I think to be able to do this art and to be able to share it is one of my biggest accomplishments. I'm okay with them having the questions I’m okay with sharing some of the bad experiences that they're not; Yeah, they were bad but I’m glad I’m validating it, letting it go and I feel lighter. Um before I wanted to puke tar and that's the only word, I can say that's the only sentence I could say. These words that I speak today are from you Miss Debi; from Irene; from Alisa; Miss Qira um gifts given to me in conversations throughout the five years since I'm continuous with cannabis. And I think there was a question you asked what came first cannabis or art? Um I think it wasn't until my system; like my support system and my endocannabinoid system was balanced a little bit. I still have a ways to go on that also that I could start to think this way to be able to express this way isn't a thought in my head. Um I guess I tried art and it was definitely within days shunned away and be like you're taking too much time you got other things to do.

Debi - I think cannabis actually has given women a gift that I don't think we could have ever imagined but if you allow yourself to sit with it and you find the right well the right kind of cannabinoid for yourself and you're nourishing your system and you just sit with it and allow yourself to explore yourself. It really is uplifting and changing and being more in tune with who you are. You know at 60 years old I found that I met a person that has been inside for a very long time and I was able to have a voice and I was able to stand up for myself in ways that I couldn't before cannabis. It has really changed things

MuffyD – Right

Debi - and made me more expressive.

MuffyD – I felt like she was hiding forever because someone's like she's gone, and I was like no she's just scared and hiding. That little that person that is fully who we are we do these types just to protect ourselves and that little girl we learned very early on especially as women and what not to do and even if we don't want to it is so habited within us to keep the calm in the house. Um I always said it soothes the beast of the day um I will do I won't bend who I am my integrity was always intact. I did I am good at fighting you see me arguing and holding my side I do very well I’m comfortable though I realized through the shadow work that I am auto to just try to keep calm of the day when I don't have to do the fighting.

Debi - So how long did it take you to discover that you could mix cannabis and art together and actually express yourself and do your inner healing?

MuffyD - This is where it just came recently, I never mix cannabis and work so I would wait all day um until I got home to medicate. Since COVID in April of 2020 I have not worked for the first time in my life and so I think it took. Um in May, May first I hired myself and I started trying different ways of medicating and you were teaching me how we can't wait all day um to medicate and so that really hit true, but I never wanted to do the THC because it made me groggy or I thought. I had all these thoughts and I think that actually halted what the cannabis could do for me. Um because yeah you have to kind of let it do its thing and I think I was just already failing it before I even started it. And so, to freely have a day where I can meditate throughout art just started. Yeah, well me and Irene would talk Miss CannaKitty and we write this list for an art show and it easily came out and then we're talking about more art stuff and it's things are just linking and hitting and i believe when it goes easily you keep following it. When something is too much of a pull or I don't get chills on it I just really just say it's not our time we'll try it later. Um with this it just came on so easily I had no gut-wrenching feeling um everything in me said this was the right thing to do and the art just yeah started coming out. Um for some reason I was finding canvases um and yeah, I don't know I don't even know how to explain it. Like my daughter would come over with paints and we would sit and then I would get a whole painting done. My very first painting was a self-portrait, and I was I looked at it and I don't complete any art. I usually it's they're all unfinished but I think we are unfinished, so I really think that's fine. I’m not gonna overly judge my stuff and I think at that point I knew I was healing. I was just like I can see it I know what that picture is for me my story but when I showed it to a couple of really close friends, they see something different and that's what they're dealing with inside and um I think that was the most powerful moment. Yeah, just it came easy.

Debi - So when you sat down to do that first piece did you even have any idea what you were going to do can you explain what that process was like?

MuffyD – Ok, So yeah, my daughter came over she's been rocking these amazing pictures for me so I would give her ideas of what. Um like I have this one picture that was taken called the love junkie and so it's a girl hunched over. Um I usually take pictures of me for the reference just so I can get the shapes and she's holding a syringe full of hearts and so around the entire painting it just has all these beautiful words that people tell you that aren't real. So it's basically fake love and Um So she was coming over bringing over these other art pieces I ended up with a canvas and I was like I’m just going to try to paint a self-portrait it's something an artist should try to attempt. I picked I don't know why I took a picture of me like that but I did. I wanted it to be kind of angled and then she just kept saying check your reference because I was learning about shadowing and I love hands and hands are hard to draw. So I wanted to practice it and next thing I know it's completed. I've never completed that quickly and every time I just walked by it I was I don't know instead of like I said the gut wrench was gone and I was proud that I was able to get it out and I understood the piece I am safe and I can move on. Yeah

Debi - So and how old was your, how old was your daughter at this time?

MuffyD - So this is all during COVID, so this is all during 2020. So, she is 16 now she was 15 at the time she just turned 16 December, but she's always been my art baby. So, her growing up and doing art and I was so supportive of it I noticed why I didn't do art because my mom would tell her the same things, you're making these things happen. She would draw like decapitated teddy bears and things like that. I thought it was very good art I think she's self-expressing she's angry at the time um that's when daddy first left and so I was very understanding of it. She would throw them in the dumpster I would have to go dumpster diving go grab them I was just glad I was there to counter it so she would continue her art. And so, when COVID hit she was just so supportive, and she had acquired amazing art um paints and I’ve never touched a lot of art supplies and so when she left them there. Yeah, another piece came out of me with me as a little girl with my first trainer which was my dog. My dog had taught me to bite and definitely growl and keep protected and um. So, and I just laughed I was just like this makes me feel good I was brave I was you know and so just stuff like that. There are some heavier ones, but it made me understand I lived in a very imaginatory world as a child and um I had to cry for some of my imaginary friends that weren't real. I thought they were real, but they definitely protected and like I said I’m still here um and I’m okay and so the art just shows me how far I’ve come. I don't think I’ve ever thought about that little girl and this little girl looks so angry that I just; I just connect with this little Asian girl that I drew I know it's me, but I hope it connects with a lot of others. Um just being a child and so mad at the world and can't wait to grow up and be an adult so you can do it your way but also found out if you don't validate that child, that adolescence, that teenager once you hit adult, you're really still a child.

Debi - Well and I think that and you hit on this is that you, you know would refer back to uh imaginary things as a kid. I think that kids are very imaginative and I think that's what makes kids so beautiful is that they're so imaginative and I think that if we have trauma that's just a safe place to be imaginative and to return to that and being able to use that and express yourself through art is a really good way to do some healing and I think that's what's going to be really cool about this art show because the way you're going to express through your imagination and what you went through is very different than what uh CannaKitty is going to express through her art. If I look at her art and your art, they're very different.

MuffyD - She is the bravest person I know, and I’ve thought I had a different definition of bravery I think until I learned about these feelings. This is the first time feeling these types of feelings um and so yeah, I just think for her to be able to express she taught me to take the depression and make it my friend. The thing she's taught me just above it definitely made me take bigger strides and hits or I don't even see. I still don't have the words but I’m still learning yeah these feelings things are very very new to me we've been taught to keep them bottled up and yeah I don't have the words. I have a art piece where it's just a bunch of static um it looks like my head's full of static and I have this ball that says “shush” I have triggers sometimes I just say shush I cannot say anything else. So, I actually want to change it to speak so I’m so glad it's just in a sketch. Um I do want to make it a I don't know, we'll see what comes out. I don't like to put too many rules on what the list is I just know like I said it's coming out too easily and me and Irene both have full confidence in our entire list which is amazing.

Debi - So when you say that it's just coming out do you find that it's easier to sit and do this now and do you find that you're finding bigger growth with each one that you do?

MuffyD - Yes but I only can do it in a place that's safe. In the last um space that I was in I would not touch any of it I felt like I didn't want to put the juju of the place or how I felt into any of my pieces and I truly believe this in crafting um in anything I’ve ever done. It's always a lot of intentions a lot of spoken word onto what I create very focused and so go from an apartment that I was freely just I mean I had all my crafts all the things to create almost on a daily I was making something and to then go into two months of just it felt dark and I didn't want to touch and maybe I’ll do an art piece later on to represent that but definitely was a lot of anger and I didn't want to put any type of anger into any of the pieces that are going into the exhibits. These pieces are yeah, the past it's the past um Donna's that have overcame those times.

Debi - Do you have specifics that you have to like primers that you have to put in place to get yourself ready to sit down and do art?

MuffyD - Um I didn't at the apartment I just had everything out I walked by it and I felt like it this was the first time I had no schedule and so when I hired myself on May 1st I was like what do you do for others and that's how it started but then I was just like it your bills are paid you're gonna do it your way and if you're up till four in the morning with the kid who's. Like you taught me I’m an adult I'm going to do it my way and the only criteria was to have a safe space. I don't want to share it with anyone who doesn't deserve don't honor your story to anyone who doesn't deserve it. It can be lethal but once the shame is out of your story no one can really get to you. Art is a really great way for me to express it out and then kind of let it go. Yeah

Debi - It's not offensive it's not wrong because it's everybody's to interpret and it's just allowing yourself to open up that door and I think cannabis gives us that ability to open up that door if we allow it so that we can be expressive and put that out.

MuffyD - Someone wanted me to write out what each piece was, and I think but it's going to be different for everyone, so I don't want to limit down any feeling. Oh, that feeling of not feeling and just getting through the day and so if we can ignite a feeling. To you know I don't want to put a I don't know an explanation on that it can it's whatever's inside and I’m hoping that it can help others. I don't know how I will be at the show I want to be readily available, but I also need to know my boundary. I think these are literally 35 years of feeling you know me awakening these feelings that's why it's always you know at your own pace please reach out to when you are ready. Yeah, some of it's pretty in your face do you know what it is. I truly want to just enjoy the music outside in the dancers and that this is the biggest thing I’ve ever, ever, ever thought I would share of myself so.

Debi - So have you dealt with or processed how it's going to feel putting all of this art in one place and having yours and CannaKitty’s combined and what that aha moment is going to be or what that rush is going to be?

MuffyD - I think we've touched on it but me and CannaKitty have so many feelings it's almost unspoken and we're just like let's wait. So um we'll tap on it and it's like it's such a big feeling it's almost like we both know to wait and let's just um. We are gonna try to take a vacation a week prior to the show um to really just vent ourselves and really be just to kind of clear it out. Um it is we're gonna overthink things we're gonna be all in our feelings. Um like I said she's so brave she's already shared herself her art. Um I do look upon her I said unspoken I know she's here with me when I’m not she's not here and I feel well understood and I think we could look at each other during that time during the event and know if we're really uncomfortable to grab each other it's going to be the biggest feeling we've ever had of us.

Debi – Yeah, I think it is going to be as well.

MuffyD - Done in times of me doubting she's amazing and at times she's doubting I'm just like you're doing amazing you know just keep on going and I think that's all we've truly needed was yes people to believe in us and.

Debi - Well It's like the floodgates open basically.

MuffyD - Right, that's what I was scared of that you start a little bit next thing I know I thought I was gonna end up this crying whiny baby that I can't get out of this feeling quicksand it hurts so bad. Once you find the right people in the right, I don't know therapy I don't like that word um

Debi - I say channel.

MuffyD - Channel nice yeah

Debi –Channel it in the way that is healthy and works for you and being able to express it with art and do it that way it is a safe way it's a healthy way.

MuffyD - And it's not so much of a floodgate. You are working on one piece I usually have about five pieces going um prior to COVID and now I’m actually being able to sit with a piece and really think it out and the only thing halting me now is supplies and so once I can get more supplies in, I can get more pieces out.

Debi - So you said that you don't want to put an explanation around everything, but do you give each piece a name?

MuffyD - Yes, I do like my; the portrait it's called “She's Lovely” and the title is “Can I have her” I don't know why the names come out but no I do know now um but they seem to have titles as soon as I think about them. “My first trainer” um that's my dog and yeah, they all have titles.

Debi - So do those titles come once the piece is completely finished or do they come midway?

MuffyD - They came before some of them aren't even started. Um when me and CannaKitty sat and just was thinking of the idea and we started spitting out what kind of art we wanted to do and our list is 25 plus pieces it is in us and every like I said every time you talk to each other it's not a doubt. We're just like we got this, and I think this is one of the very first things I’ve never doubted and so that's huge for me especially because it's for it's me and then it was the trust thing and until recently until you and I got back together I didn't know I was completely still closed off. I really thought I was doing my work I was like yeah I’m learning I got this and then you said I was doing it just head which my head is amazing my brain I but I really thought I was getting it down and then you said I had to feel with my heart and that was just like oh my gosh you're right you're right.

Debi - I’ve never found anybody's hearts that leads them wrong.

MuffyD - Yes

Debi - Your head gets in the way

MuffyD – Ok

Debi - because you have things that have been placed in there by other people. You have expectations that are in there, you have responsibilities that are in there and those things some of those things are important but there's a lot of that stuff that was put on us when we were children, and it doesn't have a purpose in our life anymore.

MuffyD - It doesn't have a purpose.

Debi - Finding your purpose is really important.

MuffyD - But I also found that without guidance how do you understand the awakening and so I think to find the trusting is where I needed to start first before I could really truly start my healing because like I said I was afraid. I was afraid a lot of stuff was going to come out.

Debi - Well we all think our life is everybody's life; is like ours for so long

MuffyD – Yeah you did teach me that.

Debi - You know it's like oh everybody's life is the same and you don't know to expect or to think that there's anything differently until you're given a chance to see something differently. It's just a matter of having a good feel about your own internal instincts and understanding yourself. I think that one of the things that you and I worked a lot on is that working within your own self.

MuffyD – Correct

Debi - that in your own beliefs and your own thoughts.

MuffyD - I didn't have and I think I shut off all my instincts I was so uncomfortable I was so comfortable in the uncomfortable. I have been in the uncomfortable my whole life when I get into a good situation, I’m very uncomfortable I am waiting constantly and um I think that's all I ever wanted was one trusted adult that stayed and taught me something right and I truly can say they're only few and far between and they're literally glimpses. Um I call them glitter because in the dark glitter like a spark is so bright um and then you write them a thank you note in your journal and you never see them again.

Debi - I think it's really important to learn to trust in yourself and I think

MuffyD - The biggest lesson,

Debi - Biggest things I try to teach all women is that you are powerful you are important you matter and trust in yourself. Don't doubt yourself when you doubt yourself and that's what a lot of people kind of set you up to do when you're a kid.

MuffyD - And once you hear those words and you won't believe them at first but then it starts to sit, and it is at times of quiet I’ll hear those sometimes which is the most beautiful gift. Um usually yeah, you're just beating yourself up on what you did all day that wasn't to your standard or what you think your standards should have been or you said something and so I’m just grateful those kinds of conversations are a lot lot less now. Um and I can actually sit with the lessons that I’ve learned but yeah people also teach you all these lessons but then life gets busy it takes time you have to sit with yourself. Um it's going to take time and I think I wanted to rush it because I’m like I’m a good student teach me more. Yeah, this is the hardest stuff I’ve ever done but it's the most fulfilling. Um yeah I didn't think I could get to this point I guess.

Debi - Well and I think it's absolutely beautiful that you're going to be able to express and share with the community and show women how much work you've done and that they too have that ability.

MuffyD - Yes

Debi - and have that opportunity to actually do their own work, their self-work and get to know themselves. You know
yourself it's just you try to not allow yourself I think to fully explore who you are. I think we all have imagination of what we want to be I think we build that from when we're a little kid but when we grow up we still have so many expectations that are placed on us and you're supposed to do this and you're supposed to do that that you just never allow yourself to fully be who you are. and I think that this is the beginning of hopefully showing women that we can step out. We can be using our voices; we can express and talk about the things that we've had to put down and not do for so long that I'm hoping this will give women a new a new place to come and explore themselves and become the woman they want to be.

MuffyD - And to know that it's not yeah that you can start to let it go and it can come out of you. I didn't think that could happen like I said I didn't want to dwell on the past I didn't even want to give it any kind of attention.

Debi - I think any of us that have gone through trauma in life we need that. We need to validate that some of what we live with and what we think and what we feel is not just unique to us that other women

MuffyD – Yes

Debi - have gone through the same things. Other women have had to go to do these battles. I don't know that our work is ever done.

MuffyD -Never

Debi - I think we will always be working on this.

MuffyD - And it's practice. And it's like it is you need guidance on what is the next step and it's like you give me questions. Very simple questions at the beginning and then I sit with myself and see what those questions arise right. Never had someone to get my brain to start thinking in those lovely places program this head. I'm grateful that I can be awakened at this age that I didn't have to wait until the next and

Debi - I think that and I hope that we eventually get to this place where people understand cannabis is allowing that. Cannabis is allowing us to get to places and explore things then opening the brain and the mind up to things to feel and
Explore. Things that we never could do if we didn't have it.

MuffyD - And we need a guide on that because look at how many times yeah, I puked my first time. I did not want to try cannabis again or even my second time ended up in the hospital. You know um that was not going to be something that I was going to put in my body every day it just wasn't for me. And until I got yeah eight months I was working there before I started really using the medicine. Um I had no idea about the medicine that cannabis was for us um it took the
scientific part of it into my brain before I could even be open to try it. I just needed a job at the time.

Debi - Every single person that consumes cannabis is putting medicine in their body and I think.

MuffyD – Now I know

Debi - But I don't think the general public knows that and I think that's really important as part of even this trauma art show. Is to be able to share with people and explain to them that you're putting medicine in your body your body has been ignored and neglected all of your life with this and this is what we're able to do. This is what came out and this is for artists but there's also other parts.

MuffyD -. So yeah,

Debi - That art doesn't have to be necessarily on a canvas like you said it could be a sculpture, it can be M

MuffyD - Mosaic, let's break some dishes and then make a candle holder. I was like that is art I see art in everything my daughter used to make these nature pieces everywhere we went to the park she would just grab some leaves and sticks and she would intertwine them like a little basket and leave it for someone to find and enjoy later. I thought it was so beautiful I think like I said I think I wanted to do art my entire life. Yeah

Debi - and Now you're doing it.

MuffyD – Yes, I am because I’m an adult and I can do whatever I want

Debi – Do You think that cannabis makes you more creative and more in touch with yourself?

MuffyD - Yes I think it enhances our biggest feeling and if we actually do use the medicine and sit with it we can really start to get through those layers. Um you taught me what's the biggest feeling today Um quit thinking about all the rest and I do love in the moment. Found out though like you need to validate your past I really did try to skip it and let's just get on with it I’m alive. You do need to validate it I’m just grateful it didn't take years and years and years and years or I
got stuck but um definitely yes it enhanced. Like I some. Okay at first, I would over medicate because it would start bringing on some feels and I was medicating incorrectly once I learned more about how it enhances how we feel inside.
Like I took away all sativas thought it wasn't for me found out when I have good company though in sativa it's good combo I did some great art together. Um did sativa with someone else that was kind of from my past and I had an entire anxiety attack and so it very much will ignite your senses and if you are aware of it you can. It can definitely guide you in
what's correct and right for you if you learn to listen to it um accept it use it as your power. Like at the beginning though you have all these feelings you don't know what to do with it and I think that's why all this education is very very important.

Debi -How can people learn more or reach you to find out more about your art and the show that's coming up?

MuffyD - Okay um you can definitely reach out um the easiest way is on Instagram at Muffy.D or the Etiquette Crew page and then we also do have a website and So, one is more of just the dot com is going to be pretty much all the people um involved right now that have kinda of helped me along the way and really kind of show what I would have loved to have at the beginning and kind of just have a more guided outline on how to find that help and then the dot info is more very much educational and questions, frequently asked questions. We can make it in this world and with a little bit of support. Yeah, we can take on some really big obstacles and really start becoming who we are and what we're intended to be I. I mean I have so many people believing in me and I feel like I can do anything, and I think that's all I ever needed, and it was the hardest thing to trust myself and believe in myself. I've been trying to do that my whole life.

Debi - The thing I say is that we have trauma that happens to us when we're younger that we have no control over, but we all reach a point where we have a say and we have a voice and it's finding that to say and that voice and at one point you can't use that as an excuse for not to get it better. You have to take charge for yourself and I think that's what I love about cannabis that it allows me to express whatever I’m feeling in a kind way not in a harsh way or an ugly way.

MuffyD -Right

Debi - Kind way that it allows me to think things through and see it in a different perspective than maybe what I would have seen it before, but I think when we're a little bit more open about that we have something similar or we can relate
then we are more that I think

MuffyD - I can vouch for that for the first time yeah, I’ve been speaking of and it's been well received and each day I was getting braver to talk more but generally to specific people but then like I said you guys are still around and so it became consistent. That I can go into deeper conversations that I can share more of myself um so yeah

Debi - We have to provide a safe place for that to happen.

MuffyD – Correct

Debi - We have to provide women or anyone a place

Debi - that they can feel safe to come and be open and be sharing and I think that

MuffyD – Right

Debi- that's what everything you and Irene are doing with the trauma art show. That's what you're doing with the Etiquette Crew, that's what we're doing with Effective Cannabis,

MuffyD - Yes

Debi - With ECcho. Everything

MuffyD - Yes

Debi - that we combine all this I think that we're putting all this together to provide all of those resources that are necessary so that

MuffyD – Yes

Debi - people can heal themselves.

MuffyD – Yes

Debi - Get in touch with themselves and become who they want to be. Because that’s bottom line this is your life it's no one else's

MuffyD – and its wanted

Debi - You’re the only one that lives it

MuffyD - Yes and I think you're exactly right. With all of us team together I think you can come to one space and
have the answers and guidance at your time because like you're saying each person is different and sometimes the lessons aren't at the same time as everybody else. I jump a lot and it works well for me um I ask for lessons at the time that I can handle them and well understand them so yeah, I think we're doing great.

Debi – Well hopefully we can help identify where they need to go and what group they need to be

MuffyD – You will

Debi - with or what person you need to be with. You know so that this is where you need to start.

MuffyD – Yes, yes, yes, yes you are amazing at that. Because I never asked myself what is the biggest now and yeah and you really did teach me, I needed to get my basics. Um and then once that lesson was learned I was like wait you can't even attempt more faith until these are done um you need that basic safety foundation first and then the rest kind of
really just kind of fit into place.

Debi – Then you have to be ready, you have to be open to doing the work.

MuffyD - Very

Debi – Not something. No one can do it for you but only you can do for yourself.

MuffyD – You don’t have to do it all at once.

Debi - Someone can give you advised but you have to want to do the work yourself.

MuffyD - Yeah, we have to do our own walk there is no way for another to understand everything that is within us. We all speak a different language have come from different places um have a completely different understanding of even just one same sentence.

Debi - I love in a very different way and I think that just you know for me learning who I am and being proud of who I am and accepting who I am it allows me to make good choices for myself if you don't like the choices that I make. This is my life no one else is living it but me there's other people involved in my life but I live it, I walk and I breathe it every day. And it's really important that I think every person in the world can be able to find that and that's my goal and my hope that I could give everybody that that they could just be true to themselves.

MuffyD – Be them. It's the biggest gift Debi it is the biggest gift and I think if that gift like you said was given to at a very young age we can handle anything. 2020 bring it on they would have handled it well they would have took it on they would have been like this is an opportunity of lessons you know instead of being so scared you know. Um yeah this we have and i think the only time that change is actually going to happen is when these babies yeah, they are taught differently, and they can make a change in the world. The only thing we can do is heal now to teach them differently this generational craziness that we've lived.

Debi - Donna I thank you very much for coming by and sharing with us what you're going to be doing in the trauma art show and we will be doing another podcast with CannaKitty and Donna uh here coming up shortly to talk more about the specifics of the art show so that you can understand what you need to do or how you can contribute, how you can be involved. Thank you very much and have a beautiful day and everybody be uplifted.

MuffyD - Thank you, you stay uplifted too it was a great day,

Debi - Thank you

Debi - I will close with one final comment. Each of us if we have lived for a minute have experienced trauma. Finding ways to heal is often challenging we are finding when you combine art and cannabis it is a new and exciting way to help you address and find purpose with inner-healing.

ECho podcast is provided by Effective Cannabis where they study, learn and teach self-healing. The information we provide is for medical awareness not medical advice. We thank you for dropping in and listening